very.....little......energy!

I just wrote the longest post ever about my last few days

and why I am exhausted and then BLOOP, I pressed a button 

and it all was gone. I was lucky to even get the first posting

out, so I don't think I'll have the energy to type it all out 

again. 

The just of it is this: 2 births, 4 days, very little sleep! One 

was a 30hour home birth and the other was a slightly 

shorter 24hour hospital birth, but hey, who's counting? 

I visited the little bundles of joy today, they were both 

girls, everyone is doing very well!

This week I have two more clients due, so it doesn't look 

like I will be sleeping very well in the future (and yes I am 

aware of how silly it is to be blogging instead of sleeping).

I do not normally take this many clients but a doula 

co-worker of mine is pregnant with twins and is on bed 

rest so I'm will be taking on some of her clients. 

Normally I don't mind this lack of sleep, I am actually 

pretty good with it, but for the last few months its been 

hitting me a lot harder. Emotionally I am just tired to 

begin with, The stress of TRYING to have a baby, the 

scheduled BD, the 2ww, and the unavoidable 

disappointment is all starting to get to me. This stress

seems to double when you add lack of sleep to the mix. 

I have been working really hard this month, doing everything

I can to give us the best chance this month, but now that 

were in the 2ww I am not getting any sleep. Is this ruining 

my chances of conceiving? what kind of damage can missing

a night or two of sleeping do? am I going to have to quit 

everything I do and everything I love to just sit on my bed

and wait for a baby to grow?

I was really excited and optimistic about this cycle but now 

that I'm in the 2ww I am worried that these nights of no

sleep have screwed everything up. However, my sister in law told

me that all I need to do to get pregnant is to sit on a bed where

a woman has just given birth (ahhh, I love advice) its supposed

to be good luck, or trigger hormones or something. Who knows?

Maybe she's right, maybe it won't matter that I haven't slept 

because instead I have been on/near/in beds fresh with the 

new baby smell :) 

Before I go to bed I do want to comment on all the BFP that are 

popping up on the blogs these days. I really couldn't be happier 

for everyone and I think about you guys all the time! It's

funny, when someone I know gets pregnant I cry for three 

days, but when I hear a BFP here, I am over the moon!!

You give us all hope ladies, and I'm praying for you!