Cheers to 2010!

I have chosen to be optimistic about 2010, 'cause really, what choice 

do I have? DH and I really did nothing to ring in the New Year, the 

closest I got to a party was an overly packed spin class complete with 

disco balls and the Auld Lang Syne New Years anthem to finish it off. 

It actually was quite emotional, there were sweaty hugs all around. 

Why did we choose to do nothing? well, DH is feeling very much like

a social outcast since giving up alcohol in hopes for super strength

swimmers. He asked me very nicely if we could just stay in and I,

being so grateful for his dedication, was happy to oblige. Through 

the night he did his best to insure we had fun, he rented great movies, 

made sure we had snacks (including chocolate) and even brought out 

some non-alcoholic champagne at midnight. 

Was new years eve hard for me? a little, after the spin class I visited

a client and her one week old baby boy. I held the baby in my arms 

for the whole visit, giving mom a much needed break and myself the

worst type of heartache. Baby boy just laid there, completely chilled

out with this sweet little fingers and toes wiggling about. It would have 

been easier if the baby cried and screamed the whole visit, I could have

at least thought "oh god, thank god I don't have to hear that all day!"

To tell you the truth though, even a crying baby makes me want a baby 

these days. 

Even though I had spent New Years Eve was with my DH, I still felt a 

little lonely, like someone or something was missing. Of course we still 

had fun, we played games, watched movies and even did a little BDin' 

because lets face it, it was CD13 and that is much more important then

New Years Eve. By the time we went to bed it was 3am, I had only slept 

for one hour when a client called at let me know she was in labor. 

So, off I went to start the New Year in style, at North York General 

watching the birth of a very happy baby boy. Either this was a sign 

from god or a cruel joke, only time will tell!

Today I tried to do an overview of 2009 but gave up half way though, I 

will just let you know it was a tough year for us. We had only been 

married 6 months when we rang in 2009, so the year began with the 

end of our "honeymoon" period. Although we were together for 4 years 

before our wedding, it feels like reality didn't really sink in until 

2009. We learned that we really didn't see eye to eye on most major

marital debates, such as money, vacations, religion, education ext. 

During this time I was also starting to build up my own company and 

was working all the time for next to no monetary gains. Adding 

infertility into this mix was almost a little more then these two little

opposites could handle. 

2009 was definitely trying on our relationship but I am happy to report 

that by the time 2010 came around were beginning to think on the 

same page. It took lots of communication, compromise and patience to 

get us here, but I can now say that we are stronger going into 2010 then 

we have ever been. I am not sure if having this one common baby goal 

has brought us closer together, but whatever it is I am grateful for it. 

I feel like we are in more of a partnership now, ready for the challenges 

and decisions we will be up against while we continue our quest for 

baby #1.

Out of pure habit, I present to you my list of new years resolutions:

1. Have a baby (no big shock there)

2. Try to live in the moment, thinking about what I DO NOT have 

has robbed me of many "moments" that could have been in 2009

3. Go to spin class 4 times a week

4. Put hardwood down in my condo, then sell it

5. Buy a house

6. Continue to build skills for my company, mainly taking more 

hypnosis and business training

7. If still no baby bump by November 2nd (my 32nd b-day), start 

looking into adoption options......I know DH does not remember 

agreeing to this, but I never forget :)

8. Get a puppy

I think this is it, Happy New Year to all of you reading, I really wish

you the best in 2010 and I thank you for being here for me during 

2009, you helped me more then you will ever know!