do I have? DH and I really did nothing to ring in the New Year, the
closest I got to a party was an overly packed spin class complete with
disco balls and the Auld Lang Syne New Years anthem to finish it off.
It actually was quite emotional, there were sweaty hugs all around.
Why did we choose to do nothing? well, DH is feeling very much like
a social outcast since giving up alcohol in hopes for super strength
swimmers. He asked me very nicely if we could just stay in and I,
being so grateful for his dedication, was happy to oblige. Through
the night he did his best to insure we had fun, he rented great movies,
made sure we had snacks (including chocolate) and even brought out
some non-alcoholic champagne at midnight.
Was new years eve hard for me? a little, after the spin class I visited
a client and her one week old baby boy. I held the baby in my arms
for the whole visit, giving mom a much needed break and myself the
worst type of heartache. Baby boy just laid there, completely chilled
out with this sweet little fingers and toes wiggling about. It would have
been easier if the baby cried and screamed the whole visit, I could have
at least thought "oh god, thank god I don't have to hear that all day!"
To tell you the truth though, even a crying baby makes me want a baby
Even though I had spent New Years Eve was with my DH, I still felt a
little lonely, like someone or something was missing. Of course we still
had fun, we played games, watched movies and even did a little BDin'
because lets face it, it was CD13 and that is much more important then
New Years Eve. By the time we went to bed it was 3am, I had only slept
for one hour when a client called at let me know she was in labor.
So, off I went to start the New Year in style, at North York General
watching the birth of a very happy baby boy. Either this was a sign
from god or a cruel joke, only time will tell!
Today I tried to do an overview of 2009 but gave up half way though, I
will just let you know it was a tough year for us. We had only been
married 6 months when we rang in 2009, so the year began with the
end of our "honeymoon" period. Although we were together for 4 years
before our wedding, it feels like reality didn't really sink in until
2009. We learned that we really didn't see eye to eye on most major
marital debates, such as money, vacations, religion, education ext.
During this time I was also starting to build up my own company and
was working all the time for next to no monetary gains. Adding
infertility into this mix was almost a little more then these two little
opposites could handle.
2009 was definitely trying on our relationship but I am happy to report
that by the time 2010 came around were beginning to think on the
same page. It took lots of communication, compromise and patience to
get us here, but I can now say that we are stronger going into 2010 then
we have ever been. I am not sure if having this one common baby goal
has brought us closer together, but whatever it is I am grateful for it.
I feel like we are in more of a partnership now, ready for the challenges
and decisions we will be up against while we continue our quest for
Out of pure habit, I present to you my list of new years resolutions:
1. Have a baby (no big shock there)
2. Try to live in the moment, thinking about what I DO NOT have
has robbed me of many "moments" that could have been in 2009
3. Go to spin class 4 times a week
4. Put hardwood down in my condo, then sell it
5. Buy a house
6. Continue to build skills for my company, mainly taking more
hypnosis and business training
7. If still no baby bump by November 2nd (my 32nd b-day), start
looking into adoption options......I know DH does not remember
agreeing to this, but I never forget :)
8. Get a puppy
I think this is it, Happy New Year to all of you reading, I really wish
you the best in 2010 and I thank you for being here for me during
2009, you helped me more then you will ever know!