Friday, January 14, 2011

I'm a Safety Girl

I just wanted to thank you all for your lovely comments on the photo of the little 
"prune" (geeze, I really wish they had come up with a better fruit to describe this 
time of the baby's life). I also wanted to address some of the comments towards my 
decision for a possible home birth. I really hope I did not give the impression that 
I would put this baby in harm in anyway by making this decision. 

I am probably the the most anxious, worrisome person you would ever meet, even
now during this first trimester I won't eat or drink anything without researching all 
of the ingredients first. My only goal right now is to have a happy and healthy baby 
and I truly believe that a home birth plays into that goal for me. 

I am lucky enough to live in Canada, where in many provinces Midwives are part of
the healthcare system. The midwives work with the hospitals and have very strict 
protocol as to who is eligible for a home birth. If at any point in this pregnancy my 
health changes and I am no longer eligible to give birth at home, I will be happy to 
change my plan and move into the hospital. The same goes for the birth, Midwives
have extensive training on labour and delivery and are trained to pick up on signs that
a labour may not be going as planned. If at anytime during a labour they pick up on
funny heart rates or slow progress ext. they will move into the hospital before delivery.

Like I said, I only want to do what is right and safe for the baby and for me as a 
healthy woman I believe that staying home is a very responsible choice. Studies show
that the outcomes are the same for home birth and hospital birth, but the hospital can
sometimes come with interventions that, at this point, I am not sure I want. There are 
so many bells & whistles at the hospital that are not always necessary for a healthy 
woman in labour and can sometimes be harmful. I'm not in anyway saying I dislike the hospitals, I am SO happy they are there when they are needed. If anything were to 
change during my pregnancy or labour that caused me too need those bells & whistles 
I would be so grateful that they are there for our safety. 

Ok, well I just wanted to say that because I would hate to think that you all think after 
all these years of trying that I am putting my own best interest in front of this baby. I 
truly only have the baby's best interest at heart and as I told the midwife, I don't care 
how the baby gets here, I just want the baby to get here as safely and easily as possible. 
Also I asked her if there was any connection between conceiving with medical intervention 
and birthing with medical intervention and she said that as long as a woman is able to 
carry a baby to term the fact that help was used for conception does not play a role in the 
birth, that made me happy! 


  1. Only you know what is right for you! You have a perspective that most of us do not have, you have seen lots of normal happy healthy births, Most expectant mothers have not seen any births at all and are much more nervous about everything.
    My one experience with a birth was horrible, and that's the only experience I have to go by, I imagine if I were in you shoes, and had your knowledge I would feel totally different about home births.

  2. Nothing to do with the topic, but the title made the "Safety Dance" song get in my head. And then I thought about that scene in "Pretty Woman" where Julia Roberts pulls out all the condoms.

    On topic, I loved my epidural, but I have a low pain tolerance. Anyone who can give birth without medications gets my admiration.

  3. haha, I was actually thinking of Pretty Woman when I came up with the tittle....and don't get me wrong, I have NO idea what labour feels like so I don't know if an epidural is in my future, I'd like it not to be but If it is, thats ok too!

  4. First off, I congratulate you for knowing how you want to give birth to your child and I honestly feel it is a very personal decision. Secondly, You have been in the "field" for so many years of course you would know if this is the right decision for yourself. I have personally have not "yet" experienced motherhood but I am sure if one day I am in your shoes I would be making decisions that is best suited for me. Just like any other topic everyone has their own opinion's/experiences/biases..that is why we are all unique individuals.
    My SIL chose to use an epidural for her pregnancy and my DH at that time mentioned to her to try hypnosis to help her with the delivery etc and maybe she would not need an epidural..he mentioned this to her way before she was due for birthing but she flat out refused to hear about it..of course my DH was hurt a bit about that and I told him she is different from you and not open to these ideas but don't be hurt by each his or her own decision. I promised him I would do hypnosis one day.. So tishi..I applaud you again for getting to this point in your life..fighting through infertility and now you are pregnant and going to be a mommy soon..stay true to your own decisions because at the end of it all this is what is going to make the entire experience memorable for both you and DH for the rest of your lives! Be happy and belief what you are doing is the best..cause you are the only one who knows what is the best for you and baby!

    Hey girlfrield looking forward to seeing you soon in the near future..i want to see that pregnancy glow!! woo hoo! and give you a GREAT BIG HUG!

  5. Hi Tishi,

    I hope my comment didn't give you the impression that I was questioning your birth plan in any way or suggesting that you are making a risky choice-- because I completely agree with and support your decision and hope to have a pregnancy that allows me to do the same. I am super excited for you and am looking forward to following your story of home birth, and like I wrote yesterday, I have been searching for someone with the experience of home birth after infertility. This is an experience that interests me because it is what I want for myself. Very Best Wishes.

  6. Tishi--
    I didn't comment on your last post, but I'm 34 weeks with my baby (conceived with help) and plan on a homebirth. With my first (also conceived with help), we used Hypnobabies in a hospital and had a medication free birth that was just right, which lead me to seek out options for homebirth. I haven't done it yet, but I know that you are right that midwives are well trained to see problems and won't let me risk my own or my child's life-- we'd transport if a problem arose. Just wanted to cheer for you for seeking out options that align with what feels right for you, and to assure you that even with medical intervention to be pregnant, I was able to go natural with the first, and I hope the second. Good luck and congratulations on thinking through all of your options and finding the one that works best for your family.

  7. I will have to disagree with you - prunes are awesome. A prune can kick a date's a$$. ;p
    Homebirths are totally cool, several of my friends have had them, and everyone came out great.

  8. Hey there,

    I'm so excited for you - congratulations! Oddly enough, I found your blog through the Facebook posting of a midwife in California! What an interconnected world we live in.

    I really think that home birth in Ontario is a safer choice for most women - and the research supports that. And even when a homebirth ends in transfer, I've never known anyone who regretted the time they spent labouring at home. It's just such a nice, mellow atmosphere. I hope you can relax and have a happy pregnancy - you deserve it!


  9. There's a nice idea of balance in the thought of you having a birth with as little intervention as possible. If it's right for you and your baby, go for it girl!

  10. Thanks for explaining your decision, although I don't think you needed to... This is your baby, and your birth experience! We all know you wouldn't take unnecessary risks. I'm so excited to hear all about it!

  11. Love your thinking on this topic. I too dream of a homebirth, or at least one with the minimum amount of intervention. However in the US, our laws are not quite as supportive as yours in Canada. There is also an option of a birth center in a nearby County.

    My local hospital has a 35% c-section rate and a 90% plus epidural rate. I am just so afraid that the staff wouldn't know how to support the kind of birth plan that I want.

    I'm a long way off still from these choices, but love reading about your thinking. :)

  12. Congrats on the baby and welcome to the "crunchy" club with regards to your home birth plans! Come on in, the water's fiiiiiiiine. :)

    I birthed my first baby in the hospital and my second at home. Any other blessings we receive will be birthed at home as well (Lord willing I continue to have healthy pregnancies). Looking forward to following you on your journey!