for me was the pain meds they wanted me to take. They made me very ill and I gave
them up almost immediately. I'd far rather deal with the pain in my abdomen (which
I would have never rated as anything more then a 4 or 5 out of 10) then the feeling
of being nauseous.
Do I know how the surgery went? nope! I was sent out of the hospital as soon as i
could pee, without even the slightest word on how things went. While I was waking
up from the anesthesia I heard a nurse tell me they found Endo and it has been
removed. I am not sure if that was a dream or not, but I'll take any information I
can get for now.
Speaking of dreams, I am not sure if I have told the blog world about the twins yet.
The twins are two little boys I talk about from time to time to help me come to terms
with the Idea of IVF. To me, the only upside of having to do IVF is the possibility of
having twins, I have always wanted twins. Even when I was a little girl I forced my dolls
to be twins, of course it was the 80's so their names always rhymed and ended with
a Y, but you live and learn.
The twins I talk about these days are named Jonathan and Leo, I talk about them with
my husband as if they are already here. "You know, when the twins are here we will
need a bigger car", "I bet one of the twins will need glasses like you" ext. Oh yeah, did
I mention, these twins are a figment of my imagination?
Lately, especially after the surgery I have been having really strong dreams and
visions of these little ones. A feeling has even risen up in my whole being that makes
me feel as if these boys are really just waiting for the right time to join our family. I
am fully aware that this sounds crazy, but It's true. Perhaps I have talked about them
so much they have entered the subconscious part of my mind, and therefore my
dreams, but I feel excited and happy when I think of them.
Ok, feel free to comment on what a wacko I am, but also feel free to write and tell
me if you have ever had feelings like this. If you have had these feelings and moved on
to have children, were your feelings right? If you have not gone on to have children just
yet, do you have visions of the children you are waiting for?